Saturday, September 13, 2008

Prem Gali......

I asked her sometime back, if she always had 5-5 suitors in both hands...
She was embarrassed! Replied, it is not so...but...
As an after thought she shyly added, ........"Well, after a point of time in life, there has been some weird kind of abundance"
'Men of all kinds have shown interest, spoke of love and marriage, at times beyond these boundaries ...
May be, something in my wildness and free spirit attracts few men enough to appreciate me and challanges them enough to try to "Tame" me?'

Her response made me think about it all! I know her for quite sometime.... i also know she likes to care, sometimes cares too much to know her own needs, sometimes cares too much so as not to get abandoned, or left alone...sometimes it is a very genuine altruistic act and feeling....whatever the general effect is- it exhausts her. Leaves little energy to do things she can!
She seems to be suffering from 'empathy sickness'. A disease cursed upon many women!

In this process she has got into major troubles in life. She will care for all.... so, people who have treated her like doormat too will return back, when they need affectionate care, without much cost. And she will still care...and care for more than one or more than her capacities at any point of time...And intelligent she is, she also will keep questioning what she is doing in the name of love, and love itself!

I didn't have many answers to her questions about the nature of love and relationships..... which she herself has not read or thought about... It makes me look at what exactly is this elusive emotion??
'Adaptive Answers' at every level of intellegence and thinking crops up, but are not really sustained by experiences ... mine and everyone else!

I was hearing few sufi songs and was stuck with the plain simple understanding of love in this song (for divine beloved ..still!) loosely translated as - i got myself ready and went to meet my beloved but when i saw my beloved i forgot myself...
Didn't get?
It is same as Kabira says..."prem gali ati saankari, ja mein do na samaye.."