Friday, November 2, 2012

Lets laugh together :D

Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they have stolen. - Mort Sahl

Some other funny things I found around....

Adam's Suit

A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination and looked at the old pages as he turned them. Suddenly something fell out of the Bible and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages.

''Momma, look what I found,'' the boy called out. 

"What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. 

With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered: "I think it's Adam's suit!"
(Author Unknown)


The Magician and the parrot

A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week so the magician did the same trick over and over again. 
There was only one problem: the captain's parrot saw the show each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick.
Once he understood he started shouting in the middle of the show, "Look, its not the same hat!" or "Look, he is hiding the flowers under the table!", or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?"

The magician was furious but couldn't do anything. It was after all the captain's parrot. 
Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship unfortunately sank drowning almost all who were on the board. The magician luckily found himself on a piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot.
They stared at each other with hatred but did not utter a word. 
This went on for a day... and then 2 days... and then 3 days. Finally on the 4th day, the parrot could hold back no longer and said... 

OK, I give up. Where is the ship?



Dear Lord
So far today, God, I've
Done all right.
I haven't gossiped, haven't 
lost my temper,
haven't been greedy,
grumpy, nasty, selfish
or over-indulgent.
I'm really glad about that. 
But in a few minutes, God,
I'm going 
to get out of my bed, and from
then on
I'm probably going to 
need a lot more help!